Honeymead ... It Does a Body Good

Why does all the really cool sex research happen in Britain? Sex researchers want to know if the ancient drink, honeymead, will get some newlyweds off to a good start.

Thanks to CNN:
Mead, first brewed in Babylon more than 4,000 years ago making it one of the world's oldest alcoholic drinks, has long been believed to increase fertility and sex drive.

In ancient Persia couples were expected to imbibe the sweet mead every day for one "honey month" -- hence honeymoon -- after they tied the knot to achieve the right frame of mind for a successful marriage.
 Sounds like it might be more fun to pour ON your bride rather than IN your bride.


Scientists Clone a Mule

Scientists have cloned a champion racing mule. What the...a racing mule?

There's a joke in here somewhere about a horse's ass but I'll be damned if I can come up with it.

From Yahoo :

Mules are bred by mating a male donkey with a female horse. The breeding success is about the same as among horses alone. Mating a male horse with a female donkey produces an animal called a hinnie. Both mules and hinnies can be either male or female, but they are almost invariably sterile.

It's not going to be long before this cloning thing gets out of hand.


Blame Me

It's true. I'm responsible for thi.


Shuttle Rescue

When I came home from work last Friday one of the top stories on the NBC Nightly News said the space shuttle Columbia could have been saved.

The story said that NASA could rush the shuttle Atlantis into space as a rescue ship, transfer the Columbia crew to the rescue ship, and return safely to earth.

I knew that a rescue like this was possible, but dangerous. The TV report made it sound almost routine. Well, it turns out to be NOT very likely.

From an Orlando Sentinel report :
"It's nice to say we would have done something,"former shuttle commander Rick Searfoss said, "but you get killed in this business when you wing things like that."
 It\'s easy to slip into these kind of thought experiments about what 'could have' been done to save the Columbia crew.  There are always things that are possible. But that's not the same as 'safe'


Eat the Manatees Club

Here's a lovely story from the Orlando Weekly about a group of good ole Florida boys who poach and eat the endangered West Indian Manatee. The author, Jeffery C. Billman, can't believe it, but I'm not surprised in the least. Here's a bit:
"It's a delicious animal Mr. Billman," he said, looking at my untouched plate. "You really should have a bite." I was tempted. My animal-rights half was outraged, but I had to respect the club's ballsy defiance of the law. And frankly, the meat didn't look that bad; fork tender but not fatty, just a touch of gristle.
I took a poll -- it doesn't taste like chicken. Some club members likened it to tuna, others said it was closer to buffalo. One said it was like pork, with a hint of seafood. One guy asked if I'd ever had possum. When I said no, he told me the two were virtually indistinguishable.
The troublesome thing about the Manatee issue is no one really knows.  Every one has guesses, but no one has irrefutable facts. There's no real science and no real statistics. No one knows exactly how many there are. No one knows exactly how many are killed every year, and how.  No one knows how many there were ten years ago or twenty years ago. The good ole boys may look dumb but maybe they're not as dumb as they look.   Maybe the good ole boys have a point.


One More

I've got time for one more post before the holiday weekend begins. So I'm just going to pick some story at random.

How about...

Canada Widens Probe, Mad Cow Quarantines

It's just a matter of time before this mad cow disease infects US cows. It's already in our wild game. That's why I don't eat deer meat anymore. It's hard for me to imagine a more horrible way to die.


Hunter S. Thompson Quote of Day

From a letter to Loren Jenkins, Newsweek, dated April 24, 1976, as published in Fear and Loathing in America: The Brutal Odyssey of an Outlaw Journalist, 1968-1976.

In this letter Thompson speculates on who will be nominated for the democratic presidential ticket in 1976. His speculation about who would then become president is on-target, considering this was written 5 1/2 months before the election.
If I had to make my final bet right now, I'd have to go with Carter to get the nomination and beat Ford -- but I'm still not sure what to make of it, except that all the alternatives seem a hell of a lot worse, and I honestly doubt if the outcome of this election will make any real difference to anybody. The die is cast, the fat is in the fire, and if the Grim Reaper wants to come on like Jesus, so be it.
 My favorite part is the last sentence which I'm seriously considering for my sig file.


What an Idiot!

This just proves what an IDIOT Jayson Blair is. This Blair quote is from The Observer via USA Today:
"I was either going to kill myself or I was going to kill the journalist persona," he said. "So Jayson Blair the human being could live, Jayson Blair the journalist had to die."
 Blair was going to kill himself? Sounds like Blair was trapped in some sort of gay drama.- USATODAY.com - Ex-reporter Blair 'couldn't stop laughing' at one deception.


Everybody's Doin' It

It appears that the NYPost soundly condemns plagiarism by its freelancers while accepting advertising that facilitates it in college students.


The following screenshots appeared at 10:30am EST at the above link.

Kingdom of Fear Review

A review of the Hunter S. Thompson book, Kingdom of Fear: Loathsome Secrets of a Star-Crossed Child in the Final Days of the American Century, in The Guardian (UK):

Books | The honest outlaw

There are many great lines in this review but my favorite is:
"I have seen thousands of priests and bishops and even the pope himself transmogrified in front of our eyes into a worldwide network of thieves and perverts and sodomites who relentlessly penetrate children of all genders and call it holy penance for being born guilty in the eyes of the church. Whoops! I have wandered off on some kind of vengeful tangent here."


Be Careful What You Say

Always be careful when posing an argument. You might be going up against a professional who has studied the rules and regulations.

The Tax Cut That Wasn't

I don't own stocks because I don't have the money. I've been a little busy working for money so I can buy a few extras like, oh, FOOD!

If I did own stocks though I would be furious at the so-called tax cut on stock dividends. It is in reality a three-year moratorium.

For more information read this strong opinion from Jacob Levy.

And Virginia Postrel sums up my feelings perfectly when she says.
It's just one more example of why anyone with a brain inevitably develops contempt for Congress.

Then Why Have Teams?

Formula One has banned Team Orders. That's going to be as enforceable as the 55 mph speed limit. Here 's what this weekend 's Austrian Grand Prix winner, Michael Schumacher, said about the "ban" from a  Reuter's report: 
"Whether it's enforceable or not, I don't know," said Schumacher when asked about the new rule at a news conference at the A1 Ring. "Certainly the obvious team orders will be enforceable and we made a clear statement from our point of view on how we are going to do things. There is nothing else to add."

Read between the lines and Schumacher is saying: We will be conducting business as usual, but will be much more subtle about it. There's always any number of unfortunate "accidents" that can befall a car. (like extra long pit stops).

I can't remember the specifics right now, but I have a vague recollection of a championship contender who's car broke, the team manager called his other car into the pits, had the driver get out, and the driver contending the championship was allowed to continue in his teammate's car.

I thought that was the whole reason for fielding a multiple car team; to use the greater numbers to ensure victory. 


Indy Rant

With a few weeks before the Indianapolis 500, it's about time I wrote a little bit about the CART/IRL split.

Tony George has the right to start any type of racing league he wants. He can have any type of rule structure, race any type of car, hold as many races as he likes. I don't believe he has the right, just because he owns the race track, to dictate how the Indianapolis 500 is to be run.

The Indianapolis 500 is an American institution. It's like the Super Bowl, the Kentucky Derby, or the Daytona 500. The owner of the stadium where the Super Bowl is played cannot say that this year we will compete with players from the Canadian football league. That would be absurd. No offense intended, but Canadian players aren't up to the same level as NFL players.

Bill France, the owner of Daytona International Speedway, would be lynched if he said that next year the Daytona 500 will be run with cars from Europe. You know: Fiats, Renaults, and Peugeots.  What would happen if the owner of Churchill Downs said that next May the Kentucky Derby will not be a horse race but a camel race?

I just saw a New York Times article on how less sponsorship money means fewer cars for this year's 500. Traditionally, the 500 has had a field of 33 cars but may not this year. Here's a quote from the article:
But money often trumps tradition. The Indianapolis Star reported yesterday that teams that already have cars in the field have shown little interest in adding cars. Teams have so much cash from their sponsors, and sponsors are not interested in spending more.
 One of the reasons there is less sponsorship money is because of the bad economy. That's clear. But I can't help thinking that part of the reason is because the The Indianapolis 500 just isn't the same caliber race it used to be.

Tony George has the right to form and promote his Indy Racing League. He has the right to race his league at tracks all around the country. But George has taken an American institution, the Indianapolis 500, and made it less than it was; less than it could be. In my opinion, he's ruined it.



The Cutup Machine

This isn't as much fun I thought it was going to be. Try the William S. Burroughs Cutup Machine . I plugged in two N.Y. Times articles:

Study in Hong Kong Suggests a Higher Rate of SARS Death
Turks Reject U.S. Criticism of Opposition to Iraq War

Here's what I got:
epidemic was first detected in March, the White House position on the to 7.2 percent. war. accused France of trying by the World Health Organization had to take NATO hostage and of ranged from 2 percent, when the threatening smaller countries that had backed be among sincerity," Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan infectious diseases with the highest death said. Meanwhile, Condoleezza Rice, President Bush's national rates. Until now, fatality rates reported security adviser, bound to change somewhat as an made any mistakes, and has taken epidemic continues. But unless the numbers all the necessary steps in all fall drastically, SARS would opening its doors to people, the first major epidemiological study the American military during the Iraq of the disease suggests. Mortality rates are war. "Turkey, from the very beginning, never 55 percent States deputy defense secretary, suggesting that in people 60 and older, and the country had made a mistake up to 13.2 percent in younger by not The death rate from SARS may Officials in Turkey today rejected criticism be significantly higher than health officials by Paul D. Wolfowitz, the United had thought, up to
If I ever write a book, I'll drop in a paragraph or two of this gobbledygook to confuse and frustrate readers. It also lends an air of artistic pretension.


The Kentucky Derby is STILL Decadent and Depraved

I watched the Kentucky Derby on Saturday. I've always wanted to see the Derby in person. It's one of those Important Sporting Events, like the Indy 500, or the Super Bowl that everyone should see at least once.

This year's race was like a premature ejaculation for the moneyed society elite who thrive on the Derby and it's hoopla. The winning horse, Funny Cide,  is a gelding! The whole reason to enter and win the Derby is to charge millions in stud fees after the race. And if your horse wins the Triple Crown, well, Katie bar the door! It's like winning ten powerball lotteries.

In May 1970, Hunter S. Thompson wrote an article called The Kentucky Derby is Decadent and Depraved. I've never been to the Derby but I have friends who have. A friend of mine described the infield at the Derby as a muddy, drunken gathering that includes passed-out revelers, public sex, and general cruelty. I'm going to bet that the Derby is STILL as decadent and depraved as always.

Here's an excerpt from The Kentucky Derby is Decadent and Depraved.
Moments after the race was over, the crowd surged wildly for the exits, rushing for cabs and busses. The next day's Courier told of violence in the parking lot; people were punched and trampled, pockets were picked, children lost, bottles hurled. But we missed all this, having retired to the press box for a bit of post-race drinking. By this time we [Thompson and British sketch artist Ralph Steadman] were both half-crazy from too much whiskey, sun fatigue, culture shock, lack of sleep and general dissolution. We hung around the press box long enough to watch a mass interview with the winning owner, a dapper little man named Lehmann who said he had just flown in from Louisville that morning from Nepal, where he'd "bagged a record tiger." The sportswriters murmmered their admiration and a waiter filled Lehman's glass with Chivas Regal. He had just won $127,000 with a horse that cost him $6,500 two years ago. His occupation, he said, was "retired contractor." And then he added, with a big grin, "I just retired."


Stupid Human Trick

This would be funny if it weren't so sad.

A data entry error causes the victim to be arrested for her own beating. I like this quote from State Attorney spokesman Randy Means:
"I'm just amazed that we don't have more problems like this," said Means, who couldn't recall one.
I guess, "Opps, sorry", is an acceptable response as long as you\'re not the one spending the night in jail.

See this Orlando Sentinel article: OrlandoSentinel.com: Orange County News

Geraldo is a Dodo

In 1976 I happened to see an ABC TV story by a young reporter named Geraldo Rivera. I don't even remember what the story was about. I thought it was cool that a member of my generation, some guy with long hair, was doing news reports on TV.

I stopped thinking Geraldo was cool when he did that "Al Capone's basement" thing. It's just gotten worst over the years. I don't even think his real name is Geraldo Rivera. At one time he used the name Jerry Rivers. Now he's just like some carnival freak.

Guess what Geraldo? If you didn't do stupid shit, people wouldn't point at you and laugh. He's now got about as much credibility as the Iraqi Information Minister. This from a CNN story:

"I'm filled with smoldering anger at the grotesque exaggeration fostered by my cable competitors," Rivera writes.

HA! Smoldering Anger!! I'm rolling on the floor with laughter. Here's the whole story: CNN.com - Geraldo attacks news rivals - May. 2, 2003



Former driver Mark Blundell posts his predictions for this weekend's Spanish Grand Prix. His choices make a lot of sense. With predictions like this it's fun to be right, but it's also fun to be wrong! Blundell says:
So to sum up, my predictions for the weekend are expect Michael Schumacher to take pole and fastest lap, but I reckon David Coulthard will win with Rubens Barrichello second and Kimi Raikkonen third. Then will come the two Williams' of Juan Montoya and Ralf Schumacher, in fourth and fifth respectively with Mark Webber completing the top six. Will they finish anything like this? Who knows... but enjoy the GP...
Read the whole thing at:Yahoo! Sport - Blundell\'s view: Spanish Grand Prix

Jacques Villeneuve is a Prima Dona

Villeneuve is simply skating along on his reputation. He has not done anything significant in the years he has been with BAR. He says he may want to compete at LeMans. Ha! He should retire to snowmobile racing in Quebec.

Read this from Yahoo and laugh:Yahoo! Sport - JV considering retirement?

What the Hell?

Live Worms Found in Shuttle Debris

What the hell is this supposed to mean? Are these space worms going to mutate and eat the planet? Will guns or bug spray work on these horrible creatures? Will Michael Landon and Steve McQueen come back from the dead?